• Home
  • About + Contact
  • Advocacy
    • Obesity
    • Lipedema and Lymphedema
    • Health Insurance
  • Big Girl Reviews
  • Living with Lipedema & Lymphedema
  • Weight Loss Surgery

Born2lbfat

My life with Lipedema & Lymphedema...destined to be fat.

I Wish I Could Bottle My Confidence

April 26, 2013 by Sarah Bramblette 8 Comments

confidence

I wish I could bottle my confidence and have Dove sell the sh!t

They say women will argue about anything, and that was evident this past week as an online battle brewed after the release of Dove’s Real Beauty Sketches video. I wanted to write about the video sooner, but I’m glad life got in the way and I waited, because the chatter and discussion that has occurred makes me wonder, why do we care so much about what other people think of our looks? Why is there so much talk about the definition of beauty when everyone has different tastes and preferences?

When I first saw the Dove video I shared it on my Facebook page and commented that my picture on the left would probably look BETTER than the one described by the stranger. I’m beautiful, I know I’m beautiful and that is all that matters…to ME. Do I think everyone thinks I’m beautiful? No, I’m not vain. I’m realistic. My features do not appeal to everyone, but I learned long ago that I can only control what I was given and trying to please or impress EVERYONE is not possible, so I focus on what makes ME feel beautiful and not worry so much about what other people think of my appearance. Especially people whose opinions mean NOTHING in my daily life.

OMG, look at her socks!

Yes. Socks. It was the first week of my Sophmore year in high school, I probably weighed 350lbs, if not 400lbs. Wearing stylish clothes was not an easy task, options were limited due to my size, and family income. However, my mom always made sure we had a few new outfits to wear back to school. This day I was proudly wearing navy slacks (securely pegged and cuffed), and a rugby type shirt with navy, green, and hot pink stripes. I loved my outfit, I thought I looked stylish. We had to order the pants through a special Plus Size catalog and I was relieved they fit! During history class I was talking with my friends and overheard “oh my god, look at her socks” and noticed the girl was pointing my direction. I thought, what’s wrong with my SOCKS? They are JCPenney socks! They are just typical white socks???  I was so proud of my outfit, yet this girl found SOMETHING she didn’t like about it and made negative comment.

At that moment I realized no matter how hard I might try to impress others there will always be someone, or something negative to be said. I was not bothered by the comment, actually the rest of the year my best friend and I had a running joke when we saw this person, my friend would say “Sarah, are your socks ok?” Really, no tears were shed over someone judging my socks.

And from the other perspective, I do not give much thought to the positive comments and compliments I receive. Why? Because people often lie just to make people feel better and I do not need boost myself up on fakeness and lies. Growing up as an obese child I heard the phrase “You have such a pretty face, it’s such a shame.” Wait? What? Was that a compliment or a put down? What’s a shame? It’s a shame that I have a pretty face? Or it’s a shame that I’m fat?

Of course not everyone who gives a compliment is lying. And I often struggle to accept compliments, and not question the intention of the person giving it. It is hard. What I am talking about it not easy, even for me. The looks I get from others do sting, being judged negatively in the workplace because of my appearance hurts beyond emotionally but financially.

I learned not to value or devalue my self worth based on what others thought about me…period. I do not think I’m beautiful, I KNOW I’m beautiful. I am confident, smart, funny, and I have pretty eyes, a bright smile, and cute dimples. Those are the FIRST things I notice when I see a picture of myself. If prompted to find negatives I could comment about the break-out on my chin and my overgrown eyebrows. It’s funny, I took this no make-up picture specifically for this blog post to show the REAL me, then I realized I was still wearing my blue contact lenses and promptly took them out and retook the pictures. The REAL natural ME.

facepic

Saying I do not care about what others think of my appearance does not mean I do not take pride in how I look. There are also times when appearance matters, such as, work or special occasions. Self-confidence and pride in oneself allows for the inner beauty to shine through.

Self confidence is REAL beauty.

Of all the beauty posts I’ve seen in the past week, Colleen Clark comic gets it right: Our bodies do not define us.

Filed Under: Advocacy, Articles, Blog Post, Living with Lipedema & Lymphedema, Obesity Tagged With: advocacy, bbw, beauty, breaking, Dove Real Beauty Campaign, featured, headline, morbid obesity, obesity, sbbw, self confidence, self esteem, top

Comments

  1. Kim says

    May 3, 2013 at 7:11 pm

    It’s good to go all natural – Let you skin breathe ~~~~

    Log in to Reply
    • born2lbfat says

      May 3, 2013 at 7:23 pm

      My hates when I do not put make up on my blemishes, which I do not unless I am going to work, I explain to her that I don’t want to irritate them even more.

      Log in to Reply
  2. Michele says

    May 3, 2013 at 7:40 pm

    I agree with you–beauty comes from within–I have fought weight most of my life-now that I have lost weight (because of diabetes) I am still the very same person I always was. Those that truly matter will always see the beauty and good within!

    Log in to Reply
  3. Sarah says

    June 27, 2013 at 4:25 pm

    Fantastic, don’t need to bottle it, you’ve passed it on through your blog. Feel better about myself from just reading it! Thanks

    Log in to Reply
  4. Matto says

    May 14, 2015 at 2:56 am

    You are Awesome
    Always remember that

    Log in to Reply

Trackbacks

  1. My Guide to the Perfect Beach Body | Born2lbfat's Blog says:
    May 24, 2013 at 11:37 pm

    […] thing as a PERFECT body, no shake, or DVD is going to make you perfect. I learned long ago that people will comment on my appearance whether I am in a swimsuit or fully clothed, so I pay them no mind. Life is too short to keep […]

    Log in to Reply
  2. When being SUPER is not SUPER. | Born2lbfat's Blog says:
    June 26, 2013 at 6:27 pm

    […] Trust me it’s not SUPER. Especially not for me. Please do not read this wrong. I am me, I LOVE me, others love me. BUT it’s frustrating when many do not understand or relate to my […]

    Log in to Reply
  3. Mom, I Learned It By Watching You | Born2lbfat's Blog says:
    July 2, 2013 at 8:43 pm

    […] themselves. I was blessed to have a mother who was able to instill in me a very high level of self confidence. This was quite an accomplishment given I was an obese child. I honestly do not know how she did […]

    Log in to Reply

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

You must be logged in to post a comment.

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Search

Posts By Date

June 2025
M T W T F S S
 1
2345678
9101112131415
16171819202122
23242526272829
30  
« Jul    

Recent Comments

  • Emmie W on Lululemon cannot cover my @ss, and the sky is blue.
  • Lili Jacobson on Too Fat for Fat Acceptance?
  • Jennifer on Five ways to request a seatbelt extender
  • GG on Weight Loss Surgery Journey
  • Rachel Fife on Just Keep Splashing – My FitBloggin’ Ignite Video

Recent Posts

  • Infographic: How do compression garments work?
  • Too Fat for Fat Acceptance?
  • My TEDx Talk: Breaking Bias
  • Kelly Osbourne Fashion Police Double Standard
  • Sharing My Lipedema Story on The Doctors

Archives

PROUD! Obesity Action Coalition Member

Copyright © 2025 | Crave Theme by The Pixelista | Built on the Genesis Framework