It happened again. On the way home from the gym I stop at the grocery and someone makes a rude comment. Last time it was a woman in an electric cart laughing at my “cankles”. Yes, I have cankles, and thankfully these cankles are able to walk my nearly 400lbs body around the store and I do not need the assistance of a cart. For the record I have never used an electric cart, not that I never “needed” one, but they scare me and I’d either not go shopping or I’d endure the walk and rest myself against a normal shopping cart.
This time I didn’t hear the comments, my boyfriend heard and saw the giggles. He was far more bothered by it than I am. He was actually so bothered than he was unusually quiet during dinner. I even asked “what are you thinking about?” and he declined to say. On the way home he finally came clean. It seems the three tweens who were standing in the checkout lane and quickly excused themselves as got in line, huddled in the next lane and giggled about “her”.
It happens more times than I care to admit. I’ve been asked how am I so strong to not let that bother me. Well, of course it bothers me. Every time I get a stare or hear a giggle it stings, but only for second. After that initial sting, I remember that these people don’t know me. They don’t know what disease I have, how hard I work to fight it, or how much I’ve overcome in life.
Maybe I should tell them? Nah, I will save my energy for my priorities in life and just blog about it here.
I will say I hope those young ladies grow up to have as much self-confidence and strength that I have to deal with life’s challenges.
It is no surprise to encounter people such as this sadly. I myself have been the victim of stares and comments many times. It seems as if when it comes to weight people are less careful in their looks and statements. I guess it should be no surprise when we openly laugh at an actress that gains five or ten pounds. The grocery checkout isle is filled with tabloids showing photos of famous people who gained weight with snide comments next to them. It is truly a sad state. I feel sorry for these people especially the young girls because I am sure if they have not already will soon feel the sting of a hurtful look or comment. There is no shelter from this in our world today. All we can do is look within and know we are beautiful, inside and out and project that to the world the way best we can.
I’m a victim too. Its not a fun thing to experience and I get even more embarassed when they do that in front of my husband.
I don’t even know where to start. I started reading just because I clicked on your website from Facebook. I, personally, don’t understand why it would ever be okay to make fun of anyone EVER. Beyond reprehensible. There aren’t words to describe. I’ve never been obese. The fact is that we all have something about us that someone might make fun of us for. I have extremely visible, very bad vericose and spider veins that spread out over my legs like a three-dimensional rendering of a road map in beautiful reds and vibrant raised purples. In the summer, I don’t wear shorts, choosing instead to sweat in long jeans. Last week, I thought I might wear capris to work since it was an hundred and ten degrees here in C-bus. Just as soon as I walked in, one of the girls I work with asked me why my ankles were dirty. I amswered, “Because I don’t wash.” I figured I didn’t owe her. Later, she asked me again. “Seriously, what’s on your ankles?” Dead blood in dead veins. Happy? I’m back to long pants again. I embarrass easily and always have. People will say the most amazingly rude and thoughtless things. It’s as if they were raised by wolves. What kind of person thinks it’s okay to laugh at misfortune? I shudder to think of the color of the soul that lives in a body beautiful enough that it can point out the imperfections of those around them.
Sarah, you might just be one of the strongest people I know, and I wish you all the luck in the world dealing with your disease. You’re beautiful!